Finding contentment can be a long and hard road for some of us. Especially when we love to decorate our homes. Don’t you just love to look through home decorating magazine photos? It’s always inspiring to peruse through the latest Country Living magazine and Pottery Barn Catalog.
Sometimes I struggle with contentment…Tonight I look over at the gaping tear in the back of my sofa, which I have to cover with a throw blanket so I can ignore how bad it really looks. My sofa has now become lumpy and uncomfortable since it’s lost its shape to the point that we stuff pillows behind our backs, to keep ourselves upright!
Contentment wars with reality
We need a new sofa (well actually all new living room furniture,) but other things have been more pressing for us. Just this week our transmission in our car went out, and there went that sofa money I was saving up. So we will wait a little longer, because that is reality-that is life. I long for my house to look like those glossy magazine images, but that home exists only in my imagination. My reality is that I live in a house with three active boys. We home school, and we are all over each other every day. If I strive for the perfect magazine photos I would be so stressed and none of us would actually be truly living here. As a family, we occupy every room of our rather small farmhouse, there is no dead space here. You won’t find any open concept rooms, no walk-in closets, no large laundry room, or master bedroom suite. Those kinds of rooms just won’t exist at this point in my life or maybe ever.
Contentment is a journey
My reality is that my home doesn’t look anything like those rooms, because even though I have a torn sofa, that sofa is where I sit every day to read aloud to my boys as we snuggle up and spend quality time together. My kitchen may have mismatched appliances, and an outdated sink, but it’s where we sit around the table and share a meal. But in that same kitchen, we laugh, I bake cookies, and we join hands each supper meal to pray and thank God for the roof over our head and the floor beneath our feet. Our farmhouse might be small and quirky and old and charming all at the same time, but I wouldn’t trade it for any magazine perfect palace, because it is home. This is where my contentment settles in.
Contentment tells the story
In our home the memories that are made, meals shared, muddy boot walks, and the tears wiped are what really matters at the end of the day. My kids won’t remember whether I chose a perfect shade of paint for the bedroom wall, or if I picked out the right flooring for the living room, but they will remember whether I had contentment and was happy in my home. I want them to remember the daddy wrestling, the mommy hugs, and that we shared laughter and fun in the midst of the imperfect house. I always tell my boys that practice makes progress. So that is the philosophy we take on for our home improvement projects. We don’t strive for perfection here, because perfect doesn’t exist. I found this quote the other day, and had to share it with you.
“Be grateful for the home you have, knowing that at this moment, all you have is all you need. “
Sarah Ban Breathnach
Contentment brings peace
Maybe you feel discouraged with your home, like I have. Maybe your living conditions aren’t ideal or what you want right now, and just maybe you are like me, who has to each day keep counting my blessings instead of the amount of home improvement projects that have to be done. What if we could just live in contentment, knowing that all we have is all we need, and strive for creating a home not a magazine photo. Can you relate? Linking up here..
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Denise, I love this. It’s been on my heart all week. I love thumbing through magazines but we can’t make them our standard. Inspiration? Yes. Standard? No. Thank you for expressing this so beautifully!
Yes Jessica… I like how you put that about inspiration not standard. Amen to that! It’s the only way to find true contentment for sure.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
I don’t need a magazine photo, I just need happy faces and clean spaces.
Exactly Lisa!
You expressed this perfectly, Denise, and you are so right. When we moved a year ago from our old family home into a smaller empty nest, I so remember the tears as I said good bye to the empty house, taking photos of the home that had been ours for 28 years. But the tears were for the memories of the girls’ voices upstairs as they ran from room to room and for our conversations around the dinner table. We have a new home now, that is filling with the memories of our 4 grandchildren, and that is what I will remember about this place someday. The pretty homes are such an inspiration and I adore looking at them and gleaning ideas, but the Lord has always given us what we needed, and what He gives us is what I want.
Well Laurie as a grandmother you would have an even greater understanding of the fleeting moments and the importance of memories I am sure you are a wonderful mom and grandmother to your family!
Thank you for sharing!
I love. love. love this, Denise!!! Yes!! We do have all we need. And more.
There is so much I could say…but instead…I’ll just say… Amen.
Hugs to you my friend. Trusting with you for God’s gracious provision. “Give us this day or daily bread.”
Yes Diane, I am sure there is plenty you could say, and I know you are in a transitional time that makes your perspective deeper. I pray you are finding provision, and peace for the future journey God has for you!
Denise, I relate so well to your post–actually its as if the post was all about me. I grew up in a home where the saying ‘cleanliness is next to Godliness’–so chores and keeping everything tidy was a priority. I now live in a modest home with my hubby and two daughters–we have homeschooled since day one and as your post says–we live in every room of our home. We keep our home respectable and clean–but no where near what my home was growing up. I have days that I feel like I just don’t have the nack for keeping a house neat and tidy. Yet, the four of us have wonderful family times–there is always laughter and great conversations. And I wouldn’t trade that for a spotless house. The girls are teenagers now and it won’t be long before they will move on into having family and homes of their own–when that time comes I’ll have lots of time on my hands to keep the house in tip top shape. But for now I’m going to enjoy a home that is atleast respectable and clean as well as full of laughter and family.
I’m with you on that…though I (we) need to be careful and be on our guard against all forms of covetousness. (Luke 12:13-21) May we truly find the beauty in our homes by the LIFE that is lived there…and the LOVE that is given and received. I struggle with this, so scripture keeps my FOCUS right. Thank you, Denise, for your blog!!!
This could not be more true!!! Contentment and peace is key to any home. Everyone should strive for that with our ever growing schedules. Thanks for this post.
Needed this reminder – thanks!
I hear ya. I have resorted to hanging up the kids’ art work on the walls to cover the holes in the 75 year old plaster because the alternative is putty and repainting.
And my husband told me that new furniture is out of the question until the kids are older….so for now I have to figure out a way to scrub the pen off of the leather couch and ottoman.
The only issue I have is that I HAVE friends who have nicely decorated houses that look like a magazine. I don’t have a single friend with houses like mine, at least none that have invited me inside anyway.
Sooo needed this post!! Had plans to build onto our rather small farmhouse this spring. My husband grew up in this house with a lot of good memories and a lot of sad memories! This home has always been about family, the holidays were a shoulder to shoulder event ! Was so looking forward to a large room where family could gather comfortably but unfortunately my husband was laid off and plans had to change ! So reading your post has reminded me that even with a large room, would the memories be any better than those shoulder to shoulder holidays ?? I REALLY doubt it!!
Just lovely! Tears in my eyes because I couldn’t agree more. I was recently at a blogging photography class learning about the ins/outs of using my new DSL camera. After the class, I reflected on how we alter these home shots, sometimes so much, to create a illusion. An illusion of what, I wondered? I knew that making something more beautiful is truly creating….but did I want to create effect to alter reality? NEVER! Real is the most beautiful of all in every aspect of life and living. Thank you for your wonderful reminder today!
I love your philosophy of practice makes progress! I need to remember that.
Great post, thanks Denise!